Reflections

 Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me (Revelations 3:20, KJV).

Recently I have been thinking about where I have been in life, who I was, and how God has changed me. We often focus on the here and now but every now and then, we should look back to see how God has moved in our lives. I look at who I am now and can’t help but give God praise. I’m not a perfect human being. I mess up and I am still a work in progress. I don't have it all together. Nevertheless, God has and is changing my heart and mind drastically. My conduct is no longer the same. My mindset is an upright mindset (most of the time...it's a battle). My heart now desires to be obedient to Christ. Those changes, which are blessings, come from God alone. I can remember thinking that a new boyfriend or new friends can make life and me better. I was chasing the wrong things. After years of falling down and making the same mistakes I finally quit trying people and tried Jesus. It wasn’t easy, still isn’t easy but God is keeping me.

I look at the mindset I had years ago and the things I was doing. Some things still make me cringe. Some of the things I did, I don’t even have the courage to do again. Unless we are exposed to what the Spirit wants to reveal to us, we remain in darkness. We see what we want to see. We continue in behavior and relationships that are unhealthy. For God to reveal Himself and for us to truly hear from Him, He sometimes has to remove people from our lives.  We can’t see what God wants us to see when we are blinded by darkness. Darkness hides the real issues and detrimental thought patterns that keep us from the life God wants to give us. I used to be so angry with God for removing people from my life. However, I am realizing that God has always had a purpose for me and not everyone is included in that purpose. Apart of that purpose is healing. Healing from disappointments, hurts, bad relationships, and wrongful thinking. People often ask God for healing and deliverance. Many people were healed in the Bible. Most of those times the people had to first do something. There was an act of obedience connected to their healing. Sometimes our healing can’t take place because we continue in relationships that God has told us to cut off, or behavioral patterns that God has warned us to stop. I'm saying this to say, as I look back I realize that God couldn’t tell me certain things or bless me because of my disobedience and the people who were still hanging around.

My life is better spiritually, financially, socially, and intellectually. Not to mention the lives of my family members have been blessed because of my obedience to Christ (that’s a whole other entry). Many blessings have come but only because I gave in and allowed God to change me. I’m excited about the next five years of my life because I know who holds my life in His hands. I look forward to reflecting on more of God’s Hand on my life.

Do yourself and the people around you a favor. Seek God’s face. Seek a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Be obedient to what He is telling you to do. Trust in the Lord, and do good; Dwell in the land; and feed on His faithfulness (Psalm 37:3, NKJV).